Is it possible to reach a point in life where your spirituality, your existence and the realization of your life purpose all come together and all the uncertainty you ever felt or had just vanishes? Or do we constantly search for the one or the other never actually feeling all three connect?
In my case my spirituality and my existence of living for the now are one and the same and have reached a level where I am so in touch with reality and life that the ending to any situation any story or any new beginning is almost a given and I know exactly what the outcome will be before I venture into it.
People and places of habit have become boring and their fickle ways and lives of boredom I find just bores me. The once excitement of what the next encounter would bring is just another dull page in the day to day living of my life and that is when the question plagues me again… what the hell is my purpose.
I decided I am bored, bored of life, bored of friends, bored of new faces and bored of old faces. Places, situations, conversations, trial and tribulations, dreams and goals – it’s always the same. I have often wondered if I had had children would I have all this time to think all this time to be bored and all this time to ponder of what I need and what I want and how to fulfill my life without being bored…
Do I create the drama that unfolds because quiet is too boring or do I need drama to bring excitement …? Questions questions questions… a million and one questions that I’m now on a journey to discover and have set myself a goal, a challenge to take on that will quieten my busy mind.
The Artist’s Way – Julia Cameron
“A course in discovering and recovering your creative self” – I have the creativity I just lack the motivation and if it helps me to reconnect with my creative side then maybe I can just bring myself that peace of mind I long for.
Day 1 – Today… So I have set myself this challenge and will tackle this 12-week course starting tonight… notebook ready for notes and motivation lingering on excitement to start and excitement to end and wondering what it will inspire. However, I have owned this exact copy for 5 years and always get to the point of starting. Chapter 1, pages are bent and raffled from being read and re-read but after that, Chapter 2 its perfection, not a single page being touched or flipped through, just brand-new pages waiting to be turned, waiting to be discovered and waiting to find that creativity that lingers in my soul.
Let’s see shall we.