Social Media the new dating site or hook up place?

Lately on Social Media I get more and more requests to chat with all sorts of guys from all over the world.  It was becoming so bad at one stage I was permanently clearing out my inbox without  even seeing who it was or what they were saying.

It’s not even looking at it from a boastful place of how pretty my profile pic is, so lets chat, date and hopefully find my future husband to be.  I mean does that even happen?  Yes, it does, and if I didn’t know someone personally who it happened to I would say no.  He liked her profile pic and he said hi and today they happily married and I couldn’t be happier for them.  I was so shocked back then when I heard how they met and how it became a dating place, not just a place to keep in contact with family and friends around the world.

Oh how naïve I was then and have been. Apparently I been living under a rock because hooking up with someone on social media is very real and happens more often then you realize.  Now I am not referring to dating sites, this is completely about Social Media sites.

I have met a few guys, we all very good friends and only one I actually had a friends with benefits relationship with.  I was single and he was single so why not.  I guess it also depends on the groups you join and the pages you like. There are so many singles groups on Social Media sites no wonder everyone is meeting up this way, we all busy and have no time to actually go out after work and do the whole ‘looking at you looking at me’ attraction from across a busy room or a bar.  No now its in-boxing, and all based on comments made by yourself in a group or page you belong to or just your profile pic.

It’s all fun and you have to be vigilant about who you chatting to or meeting up with.  I have heard of some terrible stories, stalkers especially.  I would say if you chatting to someone and their page is filled with useless information or very limited posts about them, then I would be careful.

One thing I did notice, there are many lonely, desperate and horny men out there.  After two sentences of ‘hello, how are you’? You’re immediately sent the infamous dick pic which I hate to reiterate gentlemen, we ladies do not enjoy, well most of them anyway.  We enjoy conversation with mental and emotional stimulation, where as the man likes physical stimulation, yes we know this about each other.  So then you have to ask what the other party wants out of it because sending pics like this works for some and not the other and most of the time both have very different ideas of what the one wants out of the other.

So why the dick or vajay-jay pics…  well, again I have been delusional because it seems very common and very normal.  The interaction is completely through technology and it seems to work.  I however am still a little conservative, sure I am open to conversation and flirting but when it comes to splashing out pics of my vajay-jay I would prefer a meet up over coffee or drinks, old school style. See where it goes and if we happy then possibly.  I mean who knows what these individuals are doing with these pics in the first place.  At least get to know who you sending the pics to and receiving from, because I’m not saying its wrong I’m just saying be careful.

I can have lengthy conversations with whoever and if we connect then obviously the better the conversation  It’s great!  Yes I have fallen into the trap where the conversation is so great I do wonder down the road of, this could be the one.  Reality is a hard bite to bare and if you aware of it like I am now then that’s all it is, good conversation, no expectations and if you like who you talking to then the next stage begins which is always about hooking up for a shag.  It’s the reality of it all.

But there is that one possibility that does come along and it is over Social Media, and it involves a boy who is genuinely interested in that girl and its not just about hooking up.  They genuinely interested in getting to know you and the likes on your posts increase and the in-boxing starts and its real conversation.  Then the request to WhatsApp and then the call and then the first meet and its all just genuinely interest and conversation.  This person knows all about you, they have an vested interest in what you post and genuinely know who you are.  It kind of takes the worry about secrets out of the equation because you both know so much about each other.  So I have to say I agree that in today’s time of literally running out of time, there is a possibility to find love on the Internet. But it does come with a warning – there are those few that use Social Media as a gateway to lies and an interpretation of their life built on creativity to make them sound and look more appealing.

Always be vigilant and always be aware.  I can personally say that I have been misled and lied to, that the profile was not what it looked like.  How long can you keep conversation going without getting a little suspicious if they are unable to meet, forget long distance we all know that doesn’t work.   If they are constantly cancelling or coming up with excuses run for the hills, listen to your gut and trust your instinct.

You will always know…

XXX

 

 

What we take for granted.

What we take for granted.

The realisation while watching a silly advert on T.V., of a pregnant lady taking a bite of a cracker and she feels her baby move.

That feeling is something I will never experience.

My heart strings pull as I watch this scene and of course its not the first time I’ve been through it. Through the years I think I played the situation down, using the excuse I didn’t want children or I’m glad I never had. What else do you say ?

Funny how life is and just how much of a sense of humour you need to survive it. Even the most natural normal human expectation of life… and I never got the chance. I will never feel that expectation of expecting, what mother’s to be suffer through and complain about will be something I only wish for. The unforgettable labour pains, sleepless nights, baby weight, no more freedom and the cost of having a child, I will never experience that… in the end I hear the same comment… its all worth it!

I will never know will I…

Still in hope of a dream…

I’m just saying

What we know…

what we know is…

Love is a paradox of happiness, heartache and the injustice of our hearts loving and living.

I call upon anyone out there who loves with a heart filled with nothing but love. It’s alot harder then you dream of or anticipate.  Its all up to you.

If you believe in you if you believe in love, then no matter what life throws you its love.

I can honestly say… Love is the answer love is the key. It’s the depth of recognition…it’s the depths of someone loving you, without nothing but having everything. It’s the start to the end.

We all dwell on the happily ever after but it happens to the person you commit to for the rest of your life. Thats why the girls and boys who met at school and still together..I love you and admire you.

To those who meet later on, learn, love, beyond intrigued by their differences…no matter how long it takes…no one is perfect. It’s the willingness to make it work.

I love you.

Xxx